Afterwards
by BVtBear
Summary: A collection of drabbles based on Ichigo and Rukia, set mainly after the Soul Society Arc. Comments and requests are welcome.
1. Researching 'IT'

**A couple of ideas have come to mind for Bleach, and so I've decided to start writing a couple of drabbles here or there. If anybody has any requests, I would be happy to take a look at them (but right now I'm only interested in Ichigo/Rukia). As always, comments (good or bad) are welcome. **

**Rating: PG-13, language and subject, I guess**

**Rukia discovers there are books for everything**

**Post- soul society arc**

**Researching 'IT'**

She had been surprised when she had learned that there were books on such a thing. Her first thought had been: how could anyone describe it, let alone write books on the subject? And, like any other thing, Rukia thought about it. She tried her best to ignore the blush that rose to her cheeks as she recalled her first time with him. It had been very, very unorganized, that was for sure. Neither knew exactly what to do and were guided (if she could think of a way to describe it) by raging hormones.

It started by the incessant meeting and parting of mouths, using lips and teeth and tongue to do things that left them both breathless. And then, it had been the touching of skin. Maybe his hand had been on her hip or her fingers had mindlessly caressed his stomach. Either way, it was very hard to remember what triggered anything. When Rukia tried, feelings and images rushed through her instead of coherent thoughts.

She recalled how she felt very warm and how her stomach clenched and unclenched when he kissed her behind the ear. How his hands felt rough, but the way he touched her had left her trembling. Now she shivered, just with the thought of it.

If it hurt, she barely remembered, and only because his mouth had kept her busy. She could recall –furiously blushing– how after a while it began to feel very, very good. Amazingly good. Good enough, she also recollected, that he had to cover her mouth with his to keep her from making too much noise. Afterwards, she had been out of breath. He had been too. But they were both happy. And later that night she was awoken by his eager touches, only to find that she felt eager too.

She flipped a few pages in her new book, eyes widening when she discovered detailed illustrations. With a frown of concentration, she leaned in close, only to jump when a hand landed on her shoulder. She snapped the book shut and instinctively leapt off the chair, smacking the person behind her.

"Ow! What the fuck?" She was stunned to find Ichigo on the floor, with a hand cupping his jaw. He glared at her. "Rukia, you bitch, what the hell did you do that for?"

"I-Ichigo!" Rukia could feel her cheeks reddening even further and leaned down to offer her hand. "I didn't hear you come in."

"No shit, Sherlock. What the hell were you looking at?"

"A-ah.." She tried to discreetly hold the book behind her back. "N-nothing."

An eyebrow rose. "Really?" Before she could react, he had gotten up from the ground and snatched the book from her hand. "Then what's this?"

"Don't!"

Before she could do anything, he had opened it to a random page. A tinge of pink colored his cheeks. He cleared his throat, closed the book, gave it to her, and crossed to the other side of the room. "I won't even ask," he muttered. "But by tonight, you'd better have learned something new."


	2. Coming Out

**Rating: PG**

**More Ichigo/Rukia**

**Orihime's innocent question and Rukia's less innocent answer. **

**Coming Out**

"Rukia-san, if you were here while you were supposed to be in Soul Society, where did you live?"

Rukia heard the choking cough of the boy behind her and smiled at Orihime's innocent question.

"Ah…Orihime, actually I was…" She trailed off at Orihime's hopeful expression.

"Oh! Oh! And also, where do you live now?"

At this, Rukia couldn't help but to cough slightly and look around her circle of friends. They all wore the same curiously attentive look. It made her want to laugh, really. She looked over to Ichigo, who continued to choke on his sandwich. What was the big deal?

She answered honestly. "I was with Ichigo."

Orihime's eyes widened. Everyone else did the same. "Really? He gave you a room?"

Rukia shook her head. "No. At first, I lived in his closet."

Doe eyes became wider. "And now?"

"We share a bed."

Choking noises filled the air and Ichigo's perverted friend let out a low whistle. "Damn! Rukia-san, that gives a new meaning to coming out of the closet!"

Behind her, Rukia could only hear a loud groan. Was it something she said?


	3. Describe Him

**Rating: PG**

**Just a quick one, I/R.**

**Describe Him**

If she had to pick a word to explain Ichigo, it would be 'hot'. Rukia then looked to the dictionary and found that there were more meanings to the word. She blushed profusely and then cursed herself.

Not hot.

That's not what she had meant.

More like hot tempered. And she was cool and collected, which is why she figured she was so good for him. Eying the dictionary again, she figured he could be the other type of hot too. He had irregular hair color and all, but he wasn't unpleasant to look at either. She couldn't imagine him any other way. She had drawn him plenty of times, distorting his features because she knew it annoyed him, changing the hair color to see if he looked any better…

But he didn't. She liked him like that. Orange. And burnt brown. Large and overwhelming. Passionate.

Actually, 'hot' was the perfect word for him.


	4. Gone Again

**I said I was taking requests, so I took one. Renji's POV on the whole Rukia/Ichigo thing. 100 words exact. Count em'. And I think someone out there owes me a cookie. I'm not kidding. I'm a cookie freak. **

**Rating: PG-13 (if only for Renji's potty mouth)**

**Gone Again**

That liar.

That bitch.

That lying bitch.

'I just want to check on him' she said. Bullshit. I know the truth. She wanted to see him. She's been thinking about him since he left. She never stopped. 'Just once' she said, 'just to make sure he's ok.'

Ok? OK?

He fuckin' destroys the place while he's here and she's worried about him?

What a load of…

'Just once, I'll be back soon.'

"Renji."

Her brother. He wants me to stop waiting. I've waited enough, he thinks.

Two months.

No word.

Rukia.

I hate you. You made me believe you.

Again.


	5. The Hardest Part

**No warnings really. This and the next two are kinda connected….at least in my mind they are. Just a bit of drama. **

**The Hardest Part**

The hardest part….watching her go without being able to do anything. Letting her go without taking part.

Protected.

Again.

And when she was gone and he was left alone with the rain, he wondered if this is what a broken spirit felt like. Or a broken heart. All he knew was that something inside him had torn and as much as he feebly tried, he couldn't put it back together.

Useless…

Helpless…

Rukia.

Come back.

Please.

It was becoming harder to see. And even harder to stay awake. Eventually, his mind became as dark as the night around him.

It wasn't broken anymore. He questioned if it ever had been. And now all he cared about was getting her back. Saving her life like she had saved his. She deserved at least that much.

So he set himself to work.

No room for self doubt or shame…he could lose trust in himself in his dreams and answer back in the morning.

But nothing would stop him from going to save her.

…why?

He found he couldn't answer. He could only try to explain what he felt in his mind.

It was strange without her.

And he hated pretending that she had never had a place in this world.

She had a place no matter what anybody said.

Even if they couldn't see it. She had a place.

And after he realized this, the hardest part was left behind him.

It was simple to explain, really.

Rukia had been the one to change his life.

**A little dramatic, I know. But I can't help it nowadays….just feeling a little blue….**


	6. Miss Me

**No warnings. Just "fluff" I guess. Second piece of the puzzle.**

**Miss Me**

When she looked through the window, it felt like she was there for the first time. Crouching low over the edge, she surveyed the room. To her relief, it felt familiar. The first time, she remembered she hadn't seen it as a room at all, just the place she was going through to get to a Hollow. And now, she found that she was visiting again, without her costume and without her vigilant eyes.

She blinked and before she knew it, she found herself pushed against the wall. It was hard to breathe. A forearm pressed into her throat. But her eyes grew soft when she heard his voice.

"Who are you and what do you want?"

Rough as always and this, too, reminded her of the first time. Except he had kicked her to the ground then…

"I-Ichigo."

However choked her voice had been, he had recognized it instantly. He let her go.

"Rukia?" Brown eyes widened in surprise, she took the moment to look him over. He had been sleeping in shorts. He had never done that while she had been around…

"What are you doing here?" His question brought her back from her ponderings.

She thought about it. She was here because…because she had to know something. She wondered about it all the time…

"I want to know…" She stopped. And willed herself to say it. "I want to know…"

"Miss me?"

It caught her off guard.

And then she realized.

He thought about her too.

**After the next one, I'll probably start needing ideas. So again, I remind people out there...requests? Bring em' on!**


	7. Miss You

**Third piece. Much happier, I think. Only real warning is the language. And again with the fluffy….Ichigo's POV**

**Miss You**

It had grown to be a habit, I guess. I just never noticed until she was gone. It took me a while to get used to her not being in my closet. I'd open the door and expect her to be lying there, with a murderous look on her face because I'd barged in. I'd expect to find the closet floor all cluttered, pages from those stupid books she'd read on…anything, really. God, the stuff she'd do. All the stupid shit. How the hell did I put up with it? Why? Even now, I keep asking myself that stupid question.

And I was finally getting used to the idea of being alone again. I can't ever forget what I've learned, about my world, about hers. But I don't want to depend on anyone. I've fixed up a routine I'm comfortable with. I made peace with the thought of her gone. As long as she's happy….what do I care?

And then, like the stupid bitch she is, she appears again. God, like if she isn't a hundred years old! Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! And I can't fuckin' help feeling relief at seeing her. And the stupid words just fall out of my mouth.

Miss me?

She shouldn't.

She has her life back, her friends, her family, her work.

She shouldn't.

She can't notice _my_ absence in her long, never-ending life. It's small. It's insignificant.

And it doesn't matter. I shouldn't have asked. Because I don't care.

I'm not supposed to.

But she's staring at me like she's really thinking about the answer. Her eyebrows furrowed in concentration, arms crossed over the chest. And instead of answering the god-damn question, she repeats it back to _me_.

Miss me?

Miss her?

…God…

I can't lie about this. She'd know in a second. And she probably won't leave me alone until I tell her.

But she doesn't bother to wait for my answer. She gives me her own.

Yes. I do.

I can't help but to feel it again.

Relief.

How am I supposed to answer back?

I don't think I can.

I think I'd rather just get it over with…

and…

a blue moon hangs onto the sky outside the window

…_soft…_

…_I didn't think lips could be this soft… _


	8. Until We Meet

**I finally had time or inspiration or something…to write another one. Comments welcome. **

**Until We Meet **

She had thought it was going to be harder than it actually was.

Letting him go…and knowing that she wasn't going with him.

Because she couldn't.

That much had been decided, long ago when she allowed herself to even imagine coming out of the ordeal alive. Could she go back with him? Of course. She realized that there could be no question about it. If it was Ichigo, if he did succeed, if he came out of everything alive and by chance she was alive too –she could go back.

But she didn't want to. Not that way.

She wanted to wait until she could become stronger, and that was a solution she could live with. To wait.

But there were things that could not be waited for. Like letting him know how grateful she was. Although she had said she would never thank him, she couldn't let him leave without knowing how much it meant. It would be alright. _She_ would be alright. Thanks to him.

His last night in her world…

It was the least she could do, to share her body with him. After everything…she just wanted him to be happy.

So it was a surprise, (and then, not much of one), when she found that it hadn't been that hard to say goodbye after all. She had given him a piece of herself and when she was ready –when she was strong enough— she'd give him the rest.

The moment when he turned his back on her and left came, and all she could hear or think or feel was the echo of those words '_until we meet again_.'

And when this 'again' happens, she thought with a smile, he won't greet her with a kick to the head.

**I'll give myself my own comments: weird, ne? Where did that come from? **


	9. Revelations I

**Haven't posted in a while, I know. But it wasn't for a lack of trying. Spoilers for Soul Society Arc up to present in manga chapters. Comments welcome. **

**Revelations –**

**Strike the Sky**

**i.**

I told him once.

I howl at the stars but never try reaching for them.

_He_ told me once.

"Your fangs can't reach the moon."

But I proved him wrong, if only barely.

I learned the name of his Ban Kai today.

Ten Sa Zan Getsu.

Heavenly chain cutting the moon.

God, the irony.

Someone out there really wants me know…

I'm not meant for her.

**Reunion**

**ii.**

That stupid expression of his.

He looked so _dumb_.

God, does seeing her make him this happy?

I take a quick glance at her.

She doesn't look stupid.

But she feels the same.

She's just better at hiding it from everyone.

But me.

She hits him to snap him out of it.

Everyone sees it as meeting him in anger.

They're wrong.

She's greeting him with a kiss.

**Ugly**

**iii.**

Rukia had felt that Orihime's expression had been somewhat familiar, but she couldn't recognize all the feelings she had within.

"Thank you for bringing him back."

Gratefulness.

She had been so happy, had bowed so earnestly.

And yet her eyes held something else, and because it looked so much like gloominess, Rukia could only let it pass as that which could never really be explained.

When Rukia thought about again (because she couldn't get Orihime's eyes out of her head –something about it really bothered her), she understood a little more. Why did Orihime's expression remind her of her own? Had she ever been in Orihime's place?

Kaien-sama and his beloved.

She was so beautiful and strong and intelligent.

She made him happy.

And when she saw the two of them together, she wished to be like her.

She wanted to be like her so badly.

Because beside her, she wasn't enough.

Inadequate.

A soft gasp.

Rukia understood now.

And she suddenly wished she hadn't returned.

**Anyone catch a theme here? You can guess whose point of view the first two were done from. **


	10. Revelations II

**I'm pretty forgetful, and while I was writing the first Revelations, I forgot this one. So it gets to stand on its own. Comment welcome. **

**Revelations (II)**

**Warning Sign**

**iv.**

She had been having thoughts ever since they had returned.

Things she thought she shouldn't think of because it wasn't her place and it shouldn't concern her, really.

It hurt.

But the pain was so quiet and so soft that she hadn't really noticed it.

And then Rukia came back.

He looked dumbfounded –she could hear everyone talking about how dumb he looked— but she only saw his happiness.

And she was happy for him, she really was.

She said nothing at that moment. He would never have noticed her anyway.

He only noticed her with eyes full of pain.

And she could finally feel it (maybe because she could see it). It hurt a little more.

And as she continued to watch his reaction (he really just stood there, he looked quite silly), she thought: if I ask him what is wrong, he will only answer 'nothing'. But if she asks him will he say, 'everything'?

She hoped no one noticed how small she felt at that instant.

**This drabble is also (coincidentally) my reaction to someone's comment, that part of the first Revelations made them feel a bit of IchiOri going on. I can only think that this is a misunderstanding. I'm not rooting for IchiOri, I just appreciate the complications between IchiRuki. If IchiRuki do get together (and I really hope they do), I don't think it's gonna be easy. After reading the latest chapters in the manga, I just feel bad for Orihime. The poor girl is in love with Ichigo and she feels that she's not as good as Rukia. That's gotta hurt. **


	11. Breaking Down

**It's another one. My first from Ichigo's POV, I think. 100 words (w/o title) exact. **

**No warnings. Post Ch.195 of manga. Comments always welcome. **

**Breaking Down**

He hasn't seen a full moon in a while.

It's so large against the sky that without really knowing it, he's afraid.

It could fall, he thinks. Crash down to the earth.

The strength it takes to hold it back from falling, he doesn't think he has it.

He doesn't want to hurt anyone.

It's growing heavier, every day.

And he doesn't think of pushing back because he's been trying all along.

He doesn't want to know what else is hidden inside him.

_Someone, tie me down. _

Staring at the dark sky, he keeps thinking: the moon is too big.


	12. NOT a Date

**I am long overdue with this one, I owe it to Twoface21. Sorry it took forever and a half! And look! More that 100 words! Comments welcome. **

**NOT a Date**

He had said it so many times that she had believed him.

For a while.

And then she looked up the word and understood it's meaning, but …it still didn't help. From what she knew of Soul Society, she didn't think such a thing existed. And if it did, _she_ had never taken part in the any of the activities.

So…what to expect?

Nothing really.

For all she knew it was just an outing. Another reason to go exploring in the human world and learn more things about it.

Boy did she learn!

A contraption that plays moving images on a HUGE screen, all while sitting in comfy chairs and eating something that is light, salty, and buttery.

And then, after that, going to a place that sells something like noodles, only heavier, with a yummy red sauce, that always seemed to stain the corner of her mouth.

And finally, after being well fed and well entertained, going on a nice walk through a quiet park and sitting near a pretty lake, where the reflection of the stars shone through the still surface.

After all this, she turned to her companion and asked him, "Is this the part where we kiss?"

He spluttered in response. She absently patted his back, patiently waiting for his answer. After some time, he finally managed, "I told you already this is –"

"—not a date, I know. But, from what I've read, it fits the description."

He could only grunt.

She waited.

And waited.

And when she finally realized that he was going to make no move, she muttered his name in a frustrated huff and made it for him.

Really. She had heard that in the human world, blondes were stupid. She wondered why red-heads weren't also taken into account.


	13. Miss Her

**A new one, kind of, but it might seem somewhat familiar. Similar theme but with a different twist. Comments welcome. Ichigo's POV, present tense (rare for me). **

**Miss Her**

"You're glad I'm back aren't you?"

He finds he can't answer. Not when her lips are sucking his ears like that, the tips of her fingers brushing the edge of his pants. He can feel her smiling against his throat, hot breath on his skin when she answers for him, "You must be."

She shifts and lifts herself off him. He hears the rustle of fabric as it drops to the floor and feels when she presses herself back to her original position, flesh against flesh. "I don't think you can live without me."

At this, he responds. First with a soft chuckle, and then with the words, "I think I can. It's just that," he lifts his hips, takes off his pants and everything underneath, "I don't want to."

He feels her smiling again.

"Ichigo."

"Hmm?" Her hands on his side, creeping lower.

"Do you want BREAKFAST?"

He jerks at her words. "What?"

"I said, do you want BREAKFAST, ICHIIIIGOOOOOO!"

Eyes snap open to reveal a blurry figure zooming towards him. Without thinking Ichigo blocks and hits back, before sitting up and rubbing his eyes. "What? Wuzzgoinon?"

He watches as his father bounces up from the floor as if nothing has happened, brushing his coat off and flashing him a stupid grin.

"I said, my one and only son, that it's time for breakfast! Now…" Isshin steps a little closer, until his bearded face is right in front of Ichigo, "What made today's reaction slower than usual? Having a sexy dream? Eh? Thinking of some girl from school?"

Ichigo can only stare, before becoming irritated enough to push his father away with an aggravated 'geroffme!'.

He glances at the clock.

6:15am.

He really does need to get ready for school.

He watches as Isshin prances out of the room, still stupidly grinning, leaving him with the threat, "If you don't hurry up I'll eat your eggs!"

Ichigo grunts and his hands go to his eyes again. He rubs his face and sighs. Again. How many times was this going to happen?

He can't remember when it started. And he believes it must have been a gradual process, because he can't even remember how long it's been going on. Ichigo only notices that, some mornings, he wakes up unusually bothered. That when his father wakes him up with the typical energetic attacks, Ichigo isn't only annoyed with the old man; he's annoyed with himself too. He can't figure out why it disturbs him, yet he knows that part of the irritation lies with the fact that he has woken up at all.

Ichigo wants to keep sleeping. And it's only until now that his mind offers a reason for the odd, grumpy mornings, and even this, is accepted by Ichigo only subconsciously.

He explains his dreams away as something weird and totally wrong, that he shouldn't be thinking about her this way –it's not right on too many levels. And besides, she not with him anyways. She's where she's supposed to be.

But he doesn't realize that the nights are his only comfort, that his dreams are the only times he can be with her. He doesn't realize that his dreams are the only way he can ever admit to himself that he misses her and wishes that he had her back.

He's home.

But he can't help feeling a little lost.

**Eh, so this is me exploring the whole post-Soul Society arc and the area between where Ichigo feels OK being home and then finding out that he still has a hollow problem. This is one side of him that I've been wanting to poke at lately….**


End file.
